The Horror!!!

I have yet to develop little on line names for my family so we’re just going to say son (1) daughter (1) and husband (1).

I was pretty sick this weekend. Just your relatively common, run of the mill cold type thing except it filled my throat, sinuses and ears. Anyone out there with little kids. If they have an ear infection give them ice cream, or stories, or tv ot anything else they want because man THEY HURT. I went back to the doctor today and have new magic ear drops so all should be better in a few days.

My darling husband talked to my next door neighbor about coming by and checking on the kids Saturday morning as he has to work and wanted me to be able to sleep. Okay everyone all together “aaawwwww, that’s so sweet“. I rolled my carcass out of bed at 10:45, still morning but not by much. Checked in with the kids, got some Diet Pepsi (my drug of choice), slugged down some pills, etc, etc.

Then my wonderful neighbors Chris and Tri, came by and said to the wonderful son and daughter “We’re going to pick strawberries and then have lunch at Andy’s, would you wonderful tykes like to join us“. Okay those might not have been the exact words but short of “here’s a million dollars, a lifetime supply of Ben and Jerry’s Phish food and George Clooney, which would you like first” no sweeter words have ever been spoken.

So I send the adorable son upstairs to his room to get dressed. He’s got a spring in his step and ready to go. Makes it about four steps up and then in the loudest possible voice says “OH CRAP” Now remember he is seven years old.

“What’s wrong son?” asks his saintly mother.

“My Andy’s tokens were in my shorts and those went in the laundry and now I don’t have any“

I gently and sweetly reply that there is nothing to worry about, we’ll look for them later.

Chris has taught preschool so she looks to the side and covers her mouth as if she is coughing. Tri bursts out laughing, loud, deep and full out laughter.

And what was I doing? I wanted to blame television, public schools, the deterioration of our civilized society. To rage, to rant, to blame.

Instead I swallowed hard and told my darling we didn’t really like those words. I don’t need to tell you where he learned it, he learned it in the same place as most of our kids learn most of their dirty words. Hell, I was actually relieved that’s the one he chose to use. It could have been much worse. MUCH worse.

So later that evening I tell darling husband about the incident and we agree that we’ll just let it be.

Of course the next day we got another “OH CRAP” We were then able to have the conversation that we didn’t want his sister to pick up on those words and he seemed to get it.

Is that the time? OH CRAP, I’ve got to go pick up the kids!

Love - K

P.S. No payment has been received for product placement but the author is open to offers.